This is the dreamcatcher. Here, I'll catalog and analyze particularly interesting dreams of mine. I do my best to recall and analyze though I do sound a tad wack at times. I don't have a background in psychology, if you ever want to weigh in, feel free to reach out, otherwise, enjoy my rambling.
March 6th, 2026, a day the ocean washed over my grave
This is a dream that stemmed from me being mad at my friends. I don't think anyone wants to hear the drama, just know that a few of my friends really pmo. I'll give nicknames as I talk.
In this dream I was outside. It was daytime. I want to say evening, just a hint of orange in the sky, but not too much. I was at the park. My park. The park near my house. My mind had deformed it though. In the same way you can dream of a foreign building but still recognize it as your own home, I had never seen this park in my life, yet it was as if it was the same park that I had learned to ride a bike in. In this dream though, it didn't resemble a park, but some sort of cross-section between a park, a ditch, a swamp, and a levee. I walked upon a twisting, braided, elevated concrete path with a pool of filthy water mere feet below. I wasn't alone. I was walking with (fake name) Drew. We simply walked alongside each other, talking about something to (too?) insignificant to recall. At least twice, we found phones on the path. Specifically iPhones. Drew wanted to turn them in, or keep them, or do anything productive with them, but I simply broke the phones and tossed them into the water. Each time, Drew would look at me with this incredulous (not spell checking that) look, one that showed shock and a little pride. This went on until I woke up. I woke up way too early. I fell back asleep and had another dream. Probably. I can't remember. It musn't have been important.
Meaning? I should start off by saying I'm not mad at Drew. He's one of those friends who's just a little too far for you to see the faults in. I also like him. No, like, I like like him. He makes all the storms in my mind calm with his presence. He's a friend I use to escape my main group of friends, does that make sense? Here I need to introduce three new characters. We'll call them Morel, Ben, and Ping. I'm mad at these three. Again, I'm not getting into details otherwise this post would spiral and be three times as long as the previous one. I'm also not going to claim that I was in the right/I was the victim. I wasn't. What I will say is this: this past month or so has felt like the falling action of a novel when all the characters' masks slip and you realize they all suck. (cough cough Gatsby). Anyways, this park is where I usually hang out with Morel and Ben. I think the trashification of it in my dream shows how I feel. I associate the phones with Ping. He's rich like that. Me breaking them and tossing them aside should also make some sense now. In the dream, I didn't feel angry. In fact, it was tranquil, probably because I had Drew, which I guess represents my comfort/escape from it all. My only solace (and the reason I haven't put up a fuss or escalated things) is that in only ten fridays I graduate and never have to talk to these people again. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. By the way, I write these late at night in one go, so if you see any spelling errors, no you didn't.
March 3rd, 2026, a day I did nothing
I had an interesting dream last night.
In this dream, I was at the gym. It was daytime and the gym looked nice. Certainly nicer than the real life counterpart. As I was walking out, I saw a strange device on the floor. It looked like a cross between a cheap multimeter and a walkie-talkie. I picked it up and realized it was an mp3 player. I brought it to my car and plugged it in. Based on the songs I saw, I concluded it probably had belonged to this older student I used to know. I don't remember much else from the dream, sitting around and doing nothing all day made me forget it.
Like most of my recent dreams, this one is likely about growing up and the looming change of moving away for college. Let me give some context for the dream. I said the mp3 player looked like a cheap multimeter because it looked like my cheap multimeter. I have been hitting the gym a lot more in the past month. The guy I mentioned was from the year above me, he graduated last year. I had a nasty crush on him during the summer before junior year. We gave each other an album to listen to while we talked, but I never listened to his and he probably never listened to mine. Okay, actual analysis. The dream taking place during the day indicates clarity and comfort (Generally, the presence or absence of the sun sets the emotional backdrop of a dream). I was at the gym. The gym can be seen as a symbol of growing freedom and responsibility (for me). How? A long time ago, I had to go to the gym with my mom. We would drag each other there. I just did whatever machines she did and left when they she it was time to leave. When I was learning to drive, suddenly I had to drive my mom to the gym. I would drag her because I could only get in with her membership. I still would stay by her side but later I would branch off and do my own workout. Eventually, we stopped going. School/work had us to busy and we would come home exhausted. I still wanted to go though. I started paying for my own membership, and this school year, I've been going by myself. At first, I faced the same problem with exhaustion. I would try to go around 4 to avoid the 5 o'clock crowd but this was tricky and I ended up just missing most days. As I mentioned before, I started going more recently. I gave up on trying to avoid the crowd. Now I just go at 7 or 8 after homework. I stay longer too. Before, I used to go for 45 minutes to an hour, now I go for 1.5 hours. It helps that they recently added more machines. Now, why am I saying all this? Why did I just tell you the history of my gymgoing? Well, there's a pattern. What seems like forever ago, I had no car, my mom took me everywhere. I had little control. When I got my driver's lisence (hope that's spelled right) everything changed. Control was suddenly in my pocket attached to a Buc-ee's keychain. I had freedom but no drive (no pun intended). The responsibility of getting me to the gym was no longer shared, it was solely mine, and it took me a while to pick up the slack. In this way, the gym is a perfect symbol showing the relationship between freedom and responsibility, or control (at least in my life). Moving on now to the strange mp3 player. There is a lot going on here. I have multimeter but I never use it. I did use electronics back in junior year but never got to a point where I had to use it. I do plan on doing engineering in college, so I will likely have to use one then. I would like to do electronics right now, but I'm at a weird point. Since college is so close, I need to remove clutter from my room/life before I move out. It makes no sense to use my space and money on the hobby when I'm going to move out soon and have nowhere to put it and I'm going to have access to much nicer equipment and facilities than I can afford in 6 months. The multimeter appearence of the mp3 player could symbolize a couple things in my mind. Passion I'm not participating in? Potential laying dormant? It doesn't help at all that it was just lying on the floor looking like trash. Moving on, the actual mp3 player. I don't remember what the music sounded like. It had a really old looking screen. In my dream I distinctly remember comparing it to my actual mp3 player. The dream one was much older looking and much larger. I honestly don't know what to make of that. I think the crucial detail is in that guy it reminded me of. He used to be someone I looked up to, his memory stuck with me through junior year even after we stopped talking. Eventually, he graduated, I became a senior, and I pretty much forgot about him. Soon enough though, I'll be in college too. I hope by this point you're starting to see what I'm seeing. The gym representing growing freedom, responsibility, control, the mp3 player representing the quickly approaching college (oh my god i sound insane) and the scientific and mathematical passions I'll pursue. This dream almost feels like my mind already yearning to be over there, away from the confines (and security) of my family and city, working on giant model rockets and planes, using industrial grade engineering equipment. Ah. Ever since I started learning to drive I've had a bunch of really interesting dreans relating to freedom and responsibility. Even more so after getting my scholarship. The common thread that connects them all is control. That's why you're in the control room right now. I'll probably write about them in the future if anyone is interested. If you made it here, thanks for reading!